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No Clarity on the Narrow Road

(Listen)

There is a famous story that goes like this:

John Kavanaugh went to Calcutta to find out how he was to spend the rest of his life. When he met Mother Teresa, he asked her to pray for him. “What do you want me to pray for?” she replied. He then uttered the request he had carried thousands of miles: “Clarity. Pray that I have clarity.”

John was willing to do anything for God... He just wanted to know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, what that was.

“No,” Mother Teresa answered, “I will not do that.” When he asked her why, she said, “Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of.” John replied, “But you always have clarity and that is all that I desire!" Mother Teresa laughed and said: “I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God.”

At first it sounds noble, doesn’t it? We are very used to praising that type of “surrender” in the Church.

Before you praise his level of surrender or before you start wishing you were as committed as him, consider the words of Jesus to a man very similar to Mr. John Kavanaugh.

Matthew 8:19-20: And a scribe came up and said to Jesus, “Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go.”

Perfect! He is willing to go wherever for Jesus.

Jesus said to him, “Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.”

This is important, so listen: Surrender means laying down everything – including clarity – and trusting God to lead you.

In the bible, I don’t think anyone understood this more than Abraham.

God called Abraham to be a sojourner without a permanent home here on earth. The call from Jesus was no different in the New Testament and it’s no different for you today. God has called you to a life of uncertainty and dependence on Him. Abraham didn’t know then that he might be slaying his only son Isaac. He didn’t know then about the famines he’d experience. He didn’t know about the years of waiting on the Lord for the promise. He didn't know any of that then.

He surrendered everything – including the clarity he could have had in this life – and gained a crown of righteousness in another country.

That’s the point! Following the world gives you clarity in this life. Following Jesus gives you uncertainty in this life. You must understand this, children!

And so you’re facing an extreme, life-altering, eternity-paving choice at this very moment. You can have clarity for your life. It’s a decision that the scribe made after talking to Jesus there in Matthew. The broad road is full of church-goers who will surrender everything to the Lord… except for their clarity in this life.

Or, you can live like Abraham. You can lift that knife to slay your only son – the promise – even though you cannot see any other way for God to come through. The narrow road is a road where each step is trust – not clarity! But, every step you’re getting closer and closer to Jesus. And he’s enough.

3 AM

Father,

How can I stand in your presence. I can't. I am so unclean and so are my friends, people at my work, and everyone I know. I don't stand a chance. Do whatever you want with me and through me.

Is radio all about me? I don't have to work in radio if it's not about you.

Is my music really all about me? Then let me never sing another song if my heart isn't right.

I don't want to trick myself, Lord. I know what you have commanded me to do... Why do I fill my life with anything that isn't born out of fulfilling that command?

Let me only be your mouth piece here on this earth for a few years. I fear you and what you can do to me. Only by your grace can I ever even look at your face.

Let me not be consumed by not even any of the slightest perversions of your true command and call. Let me truly die to myself and teach others to do the same.

I Don't Need God For That

(Listen)

Does you life look like you rely on God?

It struck me the other day that I cannot even pray as Jesus instructed people to pray. Part of the famous "Lord's Prayer" has become outdated. I'm referring to the line:

"Give us this day our daily bread..."

We have so set up our lives to not rely on God that this verse just seems unnecessary to us now. Maybe in a time when we didn't have as much money or when resources weren't as widely accessible as they are now this prayer might have been necessary -- but there just isn't a great need for it now.

Do you see what has happened? Do you see what we've done? Slowly, over time, we have written God out of His own story.

Since the beginning of time, this whole thing has been about God. He is the center of it all. He is the star of the show.

We have slowly setup our lives to not need God. We have forgotten about him.

In just a short time the Lord will either come back, or we'll die. We don't really have that long. At that moment, all that will matter is Him. Yet when was the last time we thought about that moment? When was the last time you longed for the Lord to come back?

2 Peter 3:10 says,

"But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed. Since all these things are thus to be dissolved, what sort of people ought you to be in lives of holiness and godliness, waiting for and hastening the coming of the day of God."

God is looking for people who are waiting for that day. God is looking for people who know they need him.

Do you need him? I mean, does you life look like you're relying on him?

To be honest, I don't know how to end this discussion. I don't want you to end you life focused on yourself. I don't want you to end your life forgetting about God. More importantly, I want you to spend your life needing God.

I don't know what it is for you that keeps you from needing God. Maybe you spend too much time working, hanging out with friends, playing games, planning your future, reading books, etc. I don't know. I just know that in a few short years the things around you will be gone and all that will matter is how you spent your time.

Do you spend your life needing God or not needing him?

No Ordinary Treasure

You need to read Tozer. A.W. Tozer, in his book The Pursuit Of God, says:

The man who has God for his treasure has all things in One. Many ordinary treasures may be denied him, or if he is allowed to have them, the enjoyment of them will be so tempered that they will never be necessary to his happiness. Or if he must see them go, one after one, he will scarcely feel a sense of loss, for having the Source of all things he has in One all satisfaction, all pleasure, all delight. Whatever he may lose he has actually lost nothing, for he now has it all in One, and he has it purely, legitimately and forever.

I'm realizing how much my circumstances determine my enjoyment and satisfaction. If the things I love or enjoy are taken away, I am affected. O Father, make me a man who pursues you every moment of my life. Make my life and joy dependent on you -- not on health, food, money, people, or items.

How shallow are the thoughts of a man consumed with this world. How deep are the desires and passions of a man pursuing God.

Sustaining Power

I just started reading 1 Corinthians today. Paul begins the letter with this:

"...you are not lacking in any spiritual gift, as you wait for the revealing of our Lord Jesus Christ, who will sustain you to the end, guiltless in the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is faithful, by whom you were called into the fellowship of his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord."

Everyday I try to find other things to sustain me when what actually sustains me is the Lord Jesus Christ. I don't have to worry about how I'm going to physically or spiritually make it each day because God is faithful to sustain me in Jesus Christ our Lord. That's such a freeing thought that I can't do anything to sustain myself until the Lord returns. Sustaining happens because of the work of Jesus -- and God is the one who is faithful to bring me to the Lord on that glorious day.

Wide and Easy

I don't want to admit this, but over the course of my life, I've tended to take the easy way -- all the way down to small, insignificant matters like cutting corners on chores.

This is a character trait of mine that I don't want. You might say, "boy, I wish that was my main struggle." Well, before you get too far with wishing you could trade places, let me tell you that this character flaw really damages a lot of areas in my life. See, I take the easy way. My tendency is to relax and let sin enter my life. Sometimes I don't even care. I don't care enough to fight it -- to take every thought captive... I can fall into the same sin over and over again and just become calloused. It's easier this way.

What would be hard is to actually fight. It'd be hard to seek the Lord each and every day and ask him to fill me up so that I didn't need all the sin in my life. See, it's difficult to ask God to fill us up for a couple reasons. First, we're so used to getting all our needs from other sources. It's easier. Second, if we're honest, we think we like the fulfillment we get from those other sources more than we like it coming from God.

It's far easier to walk down this road where we wake up every day and begin to plan on how we're going to meet all our needs apart from God. O that I should ever start my day not thinking about the utter dependency I have upon God for every need!

But no one does that! Everyone plans on meeting their needs themselves. (Hence the worry, stress, fear, lust... sin!)

Then I read this: "Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few." (Matthew 7:13-14)


Father, thank you for forgiving me for my sin -- for the blatant sin that I committed today and everyday in my life. It is nearly unbelievable that you would send your Son to die so that I could be forgiven. You amaze me so much. I love you. I don't want to continue to sin against you, Lord. My heart knows you are the only place my needs will truly and eternally be met, but my head forgets each day and I slip and fall. Teach my mind to understand you more. Not from a book or a teacher, but from experiencing you everyday in my life.

May my prayer truly be as it says it Proverbs 30: "Two things I ask of you; deny them not to me before I die: Remove far from me falsehood and lying; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me, lest I be full and deny you and say, "Who is the Lord?" Make the circumstances in my life such that I cannot forget you -- take what you need.

O that I would begin each day by looking to you for my needs. O that I would believe that the majority of people are walking a broad, easy road to destruction. Father, I do not deserve to be on this narrow road. It goes to prove your greatness and your worthiness when people look at my weakness and unworthiness. How great you truly are.

Are you a Christian, or do you follow Christ?

I've always struggled with the fact that, when Jesus talked about the cost of following himself, most people weighed it and decided it was too great. Just a couple people followed. What I struggle with isn't that... That seems right when you consider Jesus calling people give everything up to follow him. What is confusing is the fact that churches today are packed with tons of people. Now that I live in Southern California, I see some pretty crazy-big churches.

Why are a lot of people today weighing the cost of following Jesus and then following him? Sadly, it's because we've created a new cost of following that most "Christian" churches have agreed upon as being O.K. to get you into heaven someday. It's preached in churches, taught at many of the big "Christian" organizations, magazines, and radio stations. So, instead of trading away our lives and taking up crosses, we can have our normal life (except, add on going to church and trying not to swear) and go to heaven. Almost all churches have signed off on this being O.K., so we think it's fine. How is this any better than the Catholic's indulgences in the 1500s? We're making an easier way to follow Christ.

Newsflash: God never changes. To truly follow Christ, you still need to treat him like a treasure in a field where you actually give up everything to follow him. You need to do what the rich young ruler could not do -- physically trade in this life for the next one. You need to do what Jesus told many crowds of people to do -- take up your cross and die with him. Our churches don't like to talk about these ones, though. With our technological advances now, and life insurance, and ways to save for retirement... We now tell "Christians" that they need to be "responsible" and "a good steward of the life God gave you." Do you think that's what Jesus would be saying to the churches today?

If Jesus were calling people to follow himself at your church, we both know that only a few people from your church would actually follow him. That's what bothers me. Why is following Christ so easy now? Because we are being led to believe that Jesus isn't requiring as much as he used to. Millions of people are going to be very shocked one day. "But, Lord, I went to church, gave 12%, served in the nursery, and prayed to accept Jesus?!"

We follow other people in the church, we follow Christian media, we follow pastors... There is this huge wave of "Christians" who are called followers of Christ by the church but wouldn't be called followers of Christ by Jesus. We follow this wave and then get upset when someone (like myself) tells us that you might as well not be calling yourself a "follower of Christ"... Because Jesus sure wouldn't call you that. I just don't want you to be shocked on that day. Don't be expecting a "well done" unless you're actually and physically following him. That, my friends, is the clearest thing in scripture. Don't listen to the church... Listen to Jesus.

I'm Bringing WWJD Back, Yeah!

Following Christ means actually following the way he lived. I'm bringing W.W.J.D. bracelets back because I can't think of a better filter to make decisions through than asking myself, what would Jesus actually do in this situation? Here's the problem, though. Too often we ask that question when we don't even have our lives setup to ask that question. We're living our safe, comfortable lifestyle and then we ask "W.W.J.D.?" about where to send our children to school... or if we should buy a second house... or should I major in counseling or finance?

People will then tell me, "But, God cares about all aspects of our lives, though."

My point is, I don't think you'd be thinking about those things if you truly had the mind of Christ. Your life has to be setup like Christ in order for you to ask what he'd do in a situation. That's why it sounds so silly to ask "W.W.J.D.?" about so many things... Because Jesus wouldn't even be in that situation!

What is the mind of Christ, then? Unfortunately, it's not as pretty as getting to live a safe, comfortable life. In order to be able to filer things through W.W.J.D., you need to be seeking the same mind as Christ -- otherwise you're just asking W.W.J.D. in situations Jesus wouldn't be in. How do you seek the same mind as Christ?

Philippians 2:1-11
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

That's how. You become a servant, you sell what you have, you are willing to die for this thing. I'm not talking about perfection here. I'm saying that there are two different paths you can be seeking. If you're on the broad path, it doesn't make sense to ask "W.W.J.D.?" because you're interacting with situations that Jesus didn't interact with because his life wasn't setup to have the safety and comfort yours has. If you're on the narrow path, that's where "W.W.J.D.?" makes sense and is actually usable.

Final point: If you're on the broad path, the only answer you should be getting to "what would Jesus do?" is: "Sell all that you have and distribute to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me."

The Sand is Running Out

I don't have much time left on this earth. I'm starting to really consider how I want to use that time. The only thing I know is that I have to hear "well done..." when I stand before the Lord. In order to hear that, I must believe. Unfortunately, the American church has taken one or two verses in scripture to make it sound like you can pray a prayer and hear "well done..." If you read the whole bible, however, you'll see fairly clearly that what you're believing is that Jesus Christ is worth trading in your whole life for.

Your judgment isn't based on having correct thoughts about Jesus and God. What is it based on then? I think the whole theme of the New Testament is pretty clear about this. No verse is clearer than Matthew 25:34-35.

"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.' Then the righteous will answer him, saying, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?' And the King will answer them, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.'"

Do you believe that Christ is worth trading in your whole life for? Imagine you've read the bible on an island your whole life -- what would you think was required of you as a "believer"? You'd understand what few in churches today do: that you must give up your life, sell everything you have, take up your cross... Trade in your life.

Not only is your final judgment based on this, but your blessing now is based on this. I'm not talking about being blessed with "the good life" (I think it's a molestation of the gospel when we say that the Lord blessed us with a huge house, nice car, great income, and then we live the safe life. The Lord isn't blessing you with those things--he's trying to see if you're going to chose Him over all your junk... and you're failing the test.) I'm talking about being blessed by getting to live everyday waiting to see how the Lord is going to provide and lead you. You get to live every day waking up and going to bed saying, "Wow... there better be a heaven. If not, then I am living the stupidest life imaginable." It is so beautiful and I don't want to live any other way.

I didn't really know you...

Thank you, Clayton McDonald, even though I didn't really know you. An 18-year-old kid who viewed the world the most like Christ I've ever seen. You loved people like you wouldn't see them again and you lived every minute like you would never have it back.

I hope I never forget that you made death so real. To those who are more concerned about having a good family, good job, good house, good car... Good everything -- you told them not to get distracted. You didn't balance the good life and the life with Jesus. You jumped in with both feet. You said we wouldn't be disappointed if we jumped all the way in.

How could I possibly live for the Christian American dream after your lesson? I will not make a wife, kids, good job, good house, good car, good everything what I strive after. That'd be molesting the Gospel. No... I'll love everyone like I won't see them again and live every minute like I'll never get it back. Thank you.

I think I heard the echo on Monday morning around 8:30 a.m. when our Lord said the words...

Well done, good and faithful servant.

www.claytonsstory.com

Important

I heard from a dear brother named Tim Shontere tonight who is back for a few months while his wife has their third child. He is in his late 20s and at 19 he decided that, though he did not feel a "call," that the Lord had already called everyone to go. He stopped pursuing the many dreams he could have pursued as a skilled young man and took his wife to the YembiYembi tribe in Papua New Guinea where he has been for the last 9 years. He has let the harsh conditions take 15 to 20 years off his life expectancy and probably his childrens' too.

He said that when he returned to the States he was handed 17 letters from other tribes in New Guinea with their own languages that no one speaks. They are begging for someone to come to them. Tim said he's heartbroken because he responds to them that there is no one to send. He said their reply was, "Then this message must not be as important as you say it is."

Is my car, house, job, and family my end? Or, are they a means to an end: the Gospel. Does the place I live... the car I drive... the dreams I chase... Do they make the Gospel look important?

Melodies

Melodies

You have been dancing in my dreams

For so long it seems

You've been dancing in my dreams

You have been singing me to sleep

Melodies I'll keep

You've been sing me to sleep

I never wanna say goodbye

I never wanna say goodbye

I never wanna say goodbye to you

You have been all my eyes could bear

You're causing me to stare

You're all my eyes could bear

Your face is all my heart can stand

You do not understand

It's all my heart can stand

You have been capturing my smile

Oh, for quite a while   

You've been capturing my smile

Audio: natehansonmusic.com

Words & Music (C) 2008 / Nate Hanson

Dead Flies

This whole week there has been a fly beating its head against the big, sunny window in my bathroom.  I left the door of the bathroom open everyday so he could get out if he wanted to, since that is the way to the trees and sun that he so eagerly desires.  But, he keeps beating his head against the glass thinking that he will get to happiness that way.

I found him dead on the floor today -- he literally tried his whole life to find happiness outdoors, but could not see the big door that was open right there for him.  He had access to the trees, sun, plants, dog poop -- He just could not take his eyes off the window for a minute to see how to really live.

Do not be like my dead, winged friend.

Smile at Eternity

[Edit 11/07/08]

As I read, I find more and more to further what I wrote below a couple weeks ago. All of my comments were, of course, pre-election in the United States. What do I think of Obama? What do I think about Prop 8 (California)? My point all along was that it's not about the people or the propositions -- it's about a group (a remnant people) that has always broken away from the world (first, the remnant in Israel and now the church today) and followed, trusted, and hoped in God. Can you look at your life and say, "I am apart of that remnant." Or, like so many church-goers, are you getting worried now that evil is showing it's face in the world? The bible warned against that so many times. Here is just one, in Ephesians 5:15-21:

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.

There was a common theme in the New Testament writers' books and letters that evil will be present in the world. The church is to follow Christ in spite of that. The church is to declare him to all nations in spite of that. The church is to have hope in Christ's return in spite of that. The church is to long for heaven because of that. In Ephesians, Paul is making a clear distinction between the days being evil and making the best use of our time. He's saying, "Look, the days are going to be evil. We know that. But you, church, make the best use of your time." What does it look like to make the best use of our time in Paul's eyes? He ended up in chains, preaching the gospel to jailers. He considered that a joy because it advanced the gospel better than him not being in chains.


[Original Post 10/18/08]

C.S. Lewis says it so beautifully when he suggests:

The Christian doctrine of suffering explains, I believe, a very curious fact about the world we live in. The settled happiness and security which we all desire, God withholds from us by the very nature of the world: but joy, pleasure, and merriment, He has scattered broadcast. We are never safe, but we have plenty of fun, and some ecstasy. It is not hard to see why. The security we crave would teach us to rest our hearts in this world and oppose an obstacle to our return to God: a few moments of happy love, a landscape, a symphony, a merry meeting with out friends, a bathe or a football match, have no such tendency. Our Father refreshes us on the journey with some pleasant inns, but will not encourage us to mistake them for home.

Our Lord, with a similar message, confused Pilate:

Jesus answered, "My kingdom is not of this world. If my kingdom were of this world, my servants would have been fighting, that I might not be delivered over to the Jews. But my kingdom is not from the world."

The world is waiting to see a group of Christians whose lives are in keeping with what they say with their mouths they believe. We say we believe in a Saviour who came to serve and get nothing in return, and yet we decide to fight for political issues. We say our hope is in God alone -- yet the world sees us worry, just like they do, about which candidates will be "in control" of our country.

I can be optimistic, not because of a man elected to office or a bill that does or doesn't get voted in. No. I can be optimistic because, while the world and many "Christians" are fighting for, worrying about, and trusting in candidates, bills, and economies, I have my eyes set on heaven where God reigns. He is letting evil run wild for a time. But, as Lewis so wonderfully reminds me, this is so that I long to be in heaven with Him.

Don't settle for the futile strivings of this world. Keep your bags packed. You're just visiting. You never belonged here.

I'm going home.

Never Forget You

Lord, give me what I need to survive today. Don't give me too much lest I forget about You and think I received it on my own.

Amen.

(Proverbs 30:8-9)

I Want to Be Like Abraham

No matter what the world says
I cannot be convinced of anything beside the Truth
Since I will gladly die for it, living for it comes naturally
When the Truth meets opposition, then it is tested within me

The Lord uses people to test if I really believe what I say I believe

I'd much rather know one great thing about God and live and die for it
than to know all there is to know about God and his laws and do nothing for him

- - -

For years I've prayed — asking God to do whatever it takes to make me be on fire for Him. I begged for that to come. Whatever it takes. Because I have to be on fire for God. "What's the point," I would ask, "of believing in a passionate love but not being passionate about that love?" Recently the Lord has asked me the simplest of questions — he's posed the simplest of challenges to me. It seems harmless, really. He has used other people and circumstances to ask this: "Nate, would you back down only slightly from your calling in life? Just a little bit, even?" When the Truth I know to be true is challenged, would I give in and live a safe life? It seems like a insignificant thing to do, really. It's only backing down a little bit, right? It's only conceding small truths about my God. It's really of no harm, right?

I've realized, however, that this is exactly what I prayed for. I prayed for these challenges to make me sink or swim with what I believe. I didn't know where they would come from, but I knew they would come. I'm so happy that my prayers have been answered and that I can stand here now with a more determined focus on my mission in life, a more passionate love for the lost, and a heart that is beating more in time with my Saviour's heart. I am so grateful that the Lord has made it clear that I have passed this test.

To a small extent, I feel like Abraham when he was asked to kill his son Isaac. Without hesitation he drew the knife to slay his son whom he loved because he knew there was something far greater. He had to be right about his relationship with God. He couldn't forsake his Love. I cannot forsake my Love. I am passionately, actively, and eternally in love with my God and I will pass any test for him.

A Unique Love Letter

It is so simple, yet so many people miss it. It is right there, yet so many people ignore it or are preoccupied with other things—"good" things like church and family. Yes. Church and family, as good as they are, can keep you from seeing it—from getting it.

Some people just get it, though. It's easy to see when someone gets it and it encourages me not to become distracted with the insignificant things of this earth (as "good" as they might sound.)

I'd like to look at one man in particular who got it. I've come to learn a little more about him over the course of the past couple years and the way he planted himself in heaven and lived on earth encourages me to live likewise. His name is Adoniram Judson. Read this selection from a letter he wrote to Mr. Hasseltine (Ann Hasseltine's father) before seeking his daughter's hand in marriage:

I have now to ask whether you can consent to part with your daughter early next spring, to see her no more in this world ? whether you can consent to her departure to a heathen land, and her subjection to the hardships and sufferings of a missionary life? whether you can consent to her exposure to the dangers of the ocean; to the fatal influence of the southern climate of India; to every kind of want and distress; to degradation, insult, persecution, and perhaps a violent death? Can you consent to all this, for the sake of Him who left His heavenly home and died for her and for you; for the sake of perishing, immortal souls; for the sake of Zion and the glory of God? Can you consent to all this, in hope of soon meeting your daughter in the world of glory, with a crown of righteousness brightened by the acclamations of praise which shall redound to her Saviour from heathens saved, through her means, from eternal woe and despair?

Talk about getting it. It brings tears to my eyes even now, though I have read it hundreds of times. Apparently his soon-to-be father-in-law got it too, because Miss Ann Hasseltine soon changed her name. Here is Adoniram's New Years letter to Miss Ann during their betrothal period:

January 1, 1811. Tuesday Morning
It is with the utmost sincerity, and with my whole heart, that I wish you, my love, a happy new year. May it be a year in which your walk will be close with God; your frame calm and serene; and the road that leads you to the Lamb marked with purer light. May it be a year in which you will have more largely the spirit of Christ, be raised above sublunary things, and be willing to be disposed of in this world just as God shall please. As every moment of the year will bring you nearer the end of your pilgrimage, may it bring you nearer to God, and find you more prepared to hail the messenger of death as a deliverer and a friend.

By the grace of God, Adoniram Judson got it. He realized that life was but a vapor that was seen for a moment and vanished the next. Life is like a log you see floating down the river—it's there for a moment and then it disappears. Three people got it in this story: Adoniram (for placing his trust in the Lord,) Mr. Hasseltine (for having the trust in the Lord to see the value of Adoniram's crazy faith,) and Miss Ann Hasseltine (for having such faith to see and be attracted to young Adoniram's correct view of eternity.)

I have loved this story for a while, and, as you might have guessed, his love letter to Miss Hasseltine was the inspiration for the name of this online journal: above sublunary things.

Adoniram was in love. Sure, he loved Ann Hasseltine, but there was a love that was far greater than any love he could have for a girl. He had an all-encompasing love for God. He was in love with God. He didn't need Miss Hasseltine to fulfill any desires in his life. He didn't need to be content in her or anything she could give him. No. He was already fully content in God. He was in love. He had the kind of love that matters—the kind of love that makes you do something about it. A man living, walking, and influencing others by faith is a beaufitul thing. Adoniram gave up everything, even his "love," Miss Ann, for the one he loved.

The Prayer for Me

Dear friends,

Pray also for me that I may realize my true purpose in life — that is, to live every moment in light of my eternal home. That I will understand, but not merely understand, what it means to belong to another country while simply visiting an earthly world. Ultimately, pray that I would desire to know the will of God. It is easy to say, but, when the ramifications are pondered, very hard to actually want.

Finally, I know the Lord has great things for me to do in and with my life. I just know it. I do not worry a bit about what I will do or who I will become because I am resolved, without an ounce of wavering, in the way I will live (therefore the how will follow.) But, pray that I will live in such a way so that, as I live, and — yes, more importantly — when I die, vast numbers of people will not know the name Nate Hanson or fall in love with me, but will know the name of Jesus Christ and fall eternally in love with him.

Bought with a Price

We Christians say things such as, "I gave my life to Christ" or "He bought me with a price." Well, if you gave your life to Christ and if he bought you, doesn't he own you — not only you, but also your desires, wants, passions, future, plans, skills... everything? I would encourage you to know not what you want to do with your life — what a selfish thought — but rather to realize who you are in Christ already. There is a calling on your life that will take your whole life simply because of the association to Christ and his country that you have. There is no time to worry about what you want to do with your life because of the business the Lord has called you to be about. Be busy in that and then come to the end of your day and the end of your life and see if you have any time left over for you.